If you’re like me, you sometimes expect the worst. Why is that? We can just as easily expect the best right?
There were 2 recent times that Melissa was out with the kids. When she didn’t come home when I expected, I immediately got worried. My mind went to places that did nothing but create more fear. Why couldn’t I just assume something equally positive? Maybe she was late because she had an opportunity to help someone or maybe she stopped off to buy a little gift for me.:0
I’m not going to go into why we so often go into this “stinkin thinkin” mode. Rather. I’ll share a couple of ideas that might help.
First, the worry itself is usually worse for us than if the actual thing we were worried about happened.
“My life has been filled with terrible misfortune; most of which never happened.” -Michel de Montaigne
Research supports this idea that most of what we worry about never happens. I know this is true with me.
The second thing we can do is focus on what we can control rather than what we can’t. If something is completely outside of our control, worrying about it won’t help. I know, easier said than done.
Finally and perhaps most important is to direct your thoughts on the positive. So, what thoughts are positive? I’ll break them down into 3 categories. I would suggest using a journal for all of these.
- Gratitude – It’s hard to be hateful when you’re grateful. Spend time thinking and writing about things you’re thankful for.
- Giving – An attitude of giving is essential for us to become more positive. Giving could be financially but it can also be done with something more valuable, our time and energy. I can’t imagine someone volunteering their time for a worthy cause and feeling negative.
In terms of money, the best image I’ve learned about giving is an open versus closed hand. We should hold our money with an open hand, ready to give. If you hold it tightly and try to control it, it will only end up controlling you.
- Vision – Write out what your vision for yourself is. How to you want to look and feel. What will your life be like when you reach your goals? Once you gain clarity around these questions, your path will become clearer.
These 3 attitudes are critical to our mindset and success. In order to achieve great things, we need to be committed to what we want to achieve as well as maintain an unwavering belief that we will get there, regardless of how uphill the climb may be.
I’d love to hear which of the 3 categories resonates most with you. I’d also love to hear about your vision. What would you like to achieve?
Billy Hofacker – Owner & Transformation Coach at Total Body Boot Camp – BS, CSCS